HONORING OUR ANCESTORS

by | Nov 1, 2024

This time of year I become keenly aware of the importance of remembering and honoring our ancestors. With holidays such as Dia de los Muertos and the anniversaries of family members passing, it is important that we continue to say their names.

It all starts with love and remembrance. There are specific customs that can vary depending on the region of your ancestry but what truly matters is the honor, fond memories, and warm embrace we share during this time. It begins on October 28 and goes through November 3 with each day having a special significant remembrance. In Mexico, it is celebrated with deep love and respect and recognizes our diverse traditions. 

As our family begins to build our ofrenda, our altar of remembrance, I am reminded of generations and where I come from and how they have guided me into being. Here is a short excerpt from my book, Under a Full Moon and a Guiding Star.

As I look back over my life, I have realized that there were guides, alaka’i, if you will, along the way that influenced me and my ability to understand the two ways I have been living: in the doing or in the being. Four of those alaka’i were my grandparents. Their personalities and the lives they chose to lead gave me a glimpse of both ways of living – doing and being. Looking back, who are the family members that were there to guide you? How can you express your gratitude for their presence in your life?

This time also brings to mind the feeling and emotions of letting go and another excerpt from my book: 

As humans, our brains are hard-wired to protect us and so we often struggle with letting go, with surrendering. Looking back I can see that at the time of Jacob’s car accident I was most certainly not ready, willing, or able to let go of my child’s life. But, as life moves on, our experiences expand our perspective and we gradually learn how and when to let go. 

I can recall the next big lesson I had in letting go was with a job I had been in for over 15 years. I had gone from being a volunteer to having a leadership position but the work environment became verbally and emotionally toxic. It was taking a tremendous toll on my health and I came to a realization that I had to get out to survive. That meant letting go of people and relationships and took several months of healing. However, I was beginning to understand the necessity of letting go of expectations; understanding that I could only control my decisions and responses. And yet, my most profound lesson of letting go was still to come. I can remember the moment when I realized that I would have to let go of my son’s physical presence. As a mother that hurt every part of my being. I did not fully comprehend the power of his spiritual presence that would stay with me always.

Sometimes that presence shows up with a little bit of a wink. A couple of years after his transition I had taken a trip with my husband to New Mexico where we discovered a connection between a Native American tribe there and his ancestry in El Paso. While there I purchased a beautifully handcrafted green malachite necklace. A year or so later I went looking for it to wear. It wasn’t in my jewelry box. I looked everywhere I thought I could have possibly left it to no avail and gave it up, lost for good. Subsequently, a few years later, I was sitting in our living room watching television, which is in a large wooden cabinet with three sections that also hold our memorabilia of Jacob with his photo and the empty urn that is engraved with a honu (green sea turtle), as well as photos of other family members who have transitioned and other mementos that connect us to our ancestry. Out of the blue, I felt this nudge which made me look at his photo and it was as if he winked at me and said, “Mom, look in the honu box in the other cabinet.” There was a small box that had previously been sitting on my dresser, and lo and behold, there it was, my necklace! I immediately looked at his photo and said, “Thanks, son” and gave a little wink back.

That wisdom has been revealed time and time again since his transition, and taught me the value of letting go, of surrendering, but in a way that is still full of hope.

“Take time to wonder at life and the world; see the humor in life where you can.”  ~ Unknown

So, this month and this season, it is my hope that you will take time to remember and honor your ancestors and the gifts that have passed on to you.

“We are descendants of our ancestors, and ancestors to our descendants.”   ~ Unknown

 

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Tell Your Story

“I am the only one who can tell the story of my life and say what it means.”       ~ Dorothy Allison, Two or Three Things I Know for Sure

We are the accumulation of the stories we tell ourselves about who we are. So changing our stories can change our personal history and change us. Writing can enable us to accomplish that shift in perspective marked by acceptance, authenticity, depth, serenity, and wisdom that is the hallmark of genuine healing. Make your mess your message. Writing about the harsh moments can lead to flashes of “moments of being” where you found comfort and joy. Writing is an essential and necessary way to achieve spiritual, emotional, and physiological wholeness and writing can be a sturdy ladder out of the pit of despair – it is a way to reach freedom and safety

“Your life is not a problem to be solved, but a gift to be opened.”  ~ Wayne Muller

 

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More Reflections…

Bring the Outside In

If you’ve never heard of biophilia, don’t worry, it’s nothing medical. Biophilia simply describes the urge we have as humans to be around nature, or our natural draw to the natural world. But it’s more than a feeling. Our bodies know that being close to nature brings us health benefits, and is actually essential for human wellbeing. Among the benefits, exposure to nature reduces heart rate variability and pulse rates, decreases blood pressure, lowers cortisol and sympathetic nervous system activity.

Close your eyes and think about the place where you feel most connected with nature. What are the colors, smells, and sounds that connect you to that experience?

Now, how might you bring that experience into your daily life and surroundings? Here’s a few ideas:

  • Plants, but only if you are able to keep them alive. (I’m not a good keeper of indoor plants)
  • Pictures/paintings of nature
  • Colors in paint on the walls or on the furniture and accessories.
  • Air – fresh air is best! And when you can’t keep the windows open then diffuse essential oils from nature like eucalyptus or pine, or sand and sea.
  • Light – We are healthier when our circadian rhythms (the natural 24-hour cycle that helps us feel energized in the morning and ready for bed in the evenings) are balanced so keep in mind that having access to good daylight helps with that.

Adding the basic elements into your everyday living space can absolutely help to connect us to the natural places.

You can also bring nature inside with meditation and here’s one to start with 

https://alakaiassociates.com/…/09/Be-a-Tree-Meditation.pdf

Make Time for Your Soul

* Learn to say no.

* Unplug the television. (and the cell phone, ipad, etc.)

* Make regular “soul” time every day. A few minutes first thing in the morning or before bed.

* Stop doing things you truly don’t want to do.

*Redesign your work schedule so that you can create time to concentrate on the things you really want to do.

*Add nurturing practices into your routine, such as meditation or walking.

*Create your own sanctuary, a place where you can work, or just be, uninterrupted.

*Do something you truly love and that will improve your life.

Let me know which ones work best for you.

Need someone to guide you on your wellness journey? Let’s talk.

Is there someone you know that could use this message? Pass it on!

A Balanced Life

Creating a balanced life means making time for the things you have to do, as well as the things you want to do. You have the power to create harmony between your responsibilities and finding time daily to do things that bring you pleasure, personal fulfillment, and rejuvenation.

Creating balance is not about perfection, it’s about building everyday habits that honor your body both physically and mentally. That’s called self care.

Here’s a few of my resources for helping create those healthy habits

https://alakaiassociates.com/resources/

https://alakaiassociates.com/book/

https://alakaiassociates.com/wellness-products/

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THE ALAKA’I BOOKSHELF

Recently a friend reminded me that the longest journey we take is the 18 inches between our head and our heart, so this month’s bookshelf additions are focused on that journey.

The first is Atlas of the Heart by Brene Brown. In this insightful book “…she gives us the language and tools to access a universe of new choices and second chances – a universe where we can share and steward the stories of our bravest and most heartbreaking moments with one another in a way that builds connection.”  I am LOVING it!

Next up is The Heart Speaks – A Cardiologist Reveals the Secret Language of Healing by Dr. Mimi Guarnneri.. This review is what captured my attention, “Like all genuine healers throughout history, Dr. Mimi Guarneri knows the power of story to heal, to make whole. She is a physician of the heart in all its many meanings.”  ~ Larry Dorsey, M.D., author of The Extraordinary Healing Power of Ordinary Things  (now another one to add to the bookshelf!)

What books have inspired you lately?

And don’t forget to add this one to your bookshelf Under a Full Moon and a Guiding Star. 

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TAKE A LOOK AT THE NEW DOWNLOADS! 

I am so grateful to all the podcast hosts who have had me on their shows this year! Each one with a unique perspective on wellness. 

https://alakaiassociates.com/downloads/

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YOUR HEALTH MATTERS

A Little TLC for Your Gut

Gut health is one of the top trends in modern health. It seems like every week more studies come out showing the connection between gut health and just about every other aspect of health. Though not conclusive, the mounting evidence suggests that maintaining a happy, healthy gut might be an important first step when trying to achieve better overall health.

Give your gut the TLC is needs with activation! Get your Kickstart Bundle today and prepare for the new activation products coming in October!

https://lanialmanza.lifevantage.com/…/6-signs-your-gut…

 

AND, I’m doing it AGAIN! This month 3 lucky winners will receive the Subscriber Giveaway which includes 3 self care gifts to help you on your wellness journey! In addition, any current subscriber who refers a new subscriber will also receive a gift!

You can also contact me to schedule a free one-on-one Discovery Call to make a plan for your wellness.

#LiveAlohaLiveWell


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